January | 2014

Lesson No. 44: Dancing through Changes

I remember the day vividly.  It was a sweet morning filled with child-like wonder and innocence. 

My 10-year-old son William gave Sunday (our puppy) and I a VIP tour of the mansion-fort he built from pillows and blankets.  The fort had bedrooms for his stuffed animals, a living room and even a sunroom.  

Our sweet morning flowed on to daily tasks and eventually the arrival of a play date. With in hours of my endearing fort tour, I stood speechless in the kitchen as William and his friend animatedly explained Twerking to me.

Not only did they tell me all about Miley Cyrus’s salacious gyrations with a foam finger, but enthusiastically re-enacted it as well. Yes, quite a dance for a 10 year old.  And just like that William is now officially graduated to land of PG-13.

Just because change is natural, doesn't make it any easier. 

No matter how much conscious breathing I do, my blood pressure sky rockets every time William does an internet search, gets on YouTube, or asks Siri random questions.  And, as much as I want my son to grow up and mature, I also want to preserve his innocence; cover his ears and eyes a little longer. 

The catch 22 here- is the more I make something a big deal or have a strong opinion – the more fascinating and interesting it becomes to William.  My rules and limitations actually help create the very thing I’m afraid of.

In essence: The more I stand on my soapbox and pontificate on the dangers of Twerking  – the more he Twerks.

On the flip side, when I’m relaxed, calm and clear, when I flow with what is happening instead of resisting it so strongly, then William is less fascinated and more fluid.  He doesn’t get as fixated and instead is able to move on more easily.

This of course is super is super important because we all know there is certainly something around the corner ready to take the place of Twerking…. And I need to be ready to dance with that.